First Love

Posted for Sunday Scribblings

I put a lot of thought into this one and almost decided not to write this week. Not to say that I did not have a first love, I truely did. But what do I write about that would really be worthy of this subject.

1. My first 'puppy' love - Brian Butler in kindergarten
2. My first love when I was racing barrels in junior high - I met him again later when I was in college and realized I was more in love with his horse, Power than I was with him.
3. My first love in high school - that one was a huge disappointment

In the end I decided to write about one of my first loves that means more to me than anything in this world. I met my husband in high school and we started dating our Senior year. While he was my first 'true' love, he gave me three gifts that truely showed me what 'love at first sight' meant. In fact he has taught me this three times.

The first was on June 6, 2001 when our beautiful daugther was born. I'd heard others talk about what a miracle birth is and the feelings you have when you first hold your baby in your arms, however until you actually do so, you don't truely understand the depth or the preciousness of these feelings! It is hard to even describe in words. It is the ultimate definition of love at first sight.

Immediately, you have feelings so strong that you would do anything to protect and create a good life for this little bundle that is laid in your arms. No matter what anyone says, newborns are NOT cute. Especially the first time you lay eyes on them. They are slimly and usually a bit deformed looking. But at that moment you do not see any of this. All you see if this beautiful baby that is a part of you and that is totally dependent upon you and your heart fills with love to a capacity you never thought possible.

Then I think of the fact that what the Lord feels for me (and always has) is so much greater than what I feel when I look at my little ones. I am 'slimy' with all the sin in my life, but he does not see any of this. He sees someone who he created and loves me unconditionally no matter what.

My little ones are not only my first love, but also make me appreciate so much more how the Lord feels for me. That is a gift in and of itself!

I've now learned what love at first sight is three times, the most recent just 3 weeks ago. It is an amazing feeling!

eugenic infanticide

Do you know what eugenic inftanticide is? I did not until I read a recent article detailing how in the Netherlands, babies (actually children under 12) can be legally killed in certain situations. Below are a couple articles I came across to read that deal with this horrible practice.

Infanticide and Abortion: fruits of the same tree

Now they want to Euthanize Children

Pushing Infaticide: From Holland to New Jersey


More disturbing, is this has been going on for quite awhile. When doctors recently admitted they've been doing this all along, they were not punished. Instead the new law/guideline was introduced to ensure that they can now do so legally!

When I read things like this going on in this world and know that people are rationalizing away their morals so they are not incovenienced I want to cry. I know God is shedding tears for these innocent lives and I know that this is what Jesus talked about when He said in the end the world will be so full of sin, only catastrophic events will be able to get through the deception they are living in and turn them back to Him.

I look at my precious children (all under 12 and therefore could be euthanized in the Netherlands) and especially my preciouse 3 week old Jesse and can not fathom someone being able to take these lives so callously. How can you explain away taking an innocent life that can not defend itself in anyway! When did we become god in that we can make these decisions as to who should live and who should die!?

Taking responsibility

Since I've been home on leave I've been watching more television than I normally do. Usually while folding laundry or something else mindless that I can not easily read or write while doing. Due to this I've been watching the news more often than usual. I've noticed a pattern that I find very disturbing. This is not really something new to me, it just seems more prominent than in the past.

Our world/nation today has a major issue with taking responsibility for our actions. I find it amazing how many stories I see about someone who has messed up and instead of admitting they've made a mistake and learning from the experience, they point the finger at someone else. It really disturbes me to see this happening so frequently!

Here are some examples:

1. Exit Exam for California High Schools - This year there are approx 47,000 high school seniors who did not pass the exit exam and therefore should not be graduating. This has been taken to court to get the exam thrown out! From what research I've done on it, part of what the exam tests is 10th grade level reading and 8th grade level math. I don't know about you, but if someone can not handle this they really should not be getting their high school diploma and continuing on either into the work force or college. If we allow this we are hurting our children more than helping them because we are not equipping them to deal with the real world.

2. Shooting in Natomas - Just a couple days ago there were four individuals who had been involved in an armed robbery. A police office confronted the people in a local shopping center. The driver of the car accelerated and hit the officer who then held onto the hood of the car and shot the driver while yelling at onlookers to get down. The driver died and the office was sent to the hospital for injuries he suffered to his leg when the driver hit him. It also showed his police cruiser with a large dent in the back of it and a flat tire. It is tragic that the driver was shot and killed by the officer, however when people commit crimes this is what occurs at times. Later there were interviews on the news with family members of the driver killed and with one of the individuals in the car. They all said he was a "nice guy" and was not trying to kill the officer. The family said he was only doing what he did because of the others in the car with him. Everyone said the police officer overreacted. (Interestingly, the original news reports claimed the officer was a hero, these other interviews came later and the story seemed to change!) Now, I don't know about you, but if I was an officer confronting four individuals involved in an armed robbery who then tried to run me over, I think I may have reacted the same way. In the end it appears the armed robbery was committed with a fake gun, however it appeared to be real. Once again, if I am a cop or someone being robbed and a gun is pointed at me I don't think I'd pause to ask the person if the gun was really real or not before I acted. I feel for the family that lost a family member, but to claim the kid was innocent (he was 19 years old) and to criticize the police officer is going too far. The way this country is going, it will soon be a crime to be a police officer and actually do your job, because you can get sued or punished for apprehending criminals.

There have been many more cases like these lately that I've noticed in which people's logic is twisted. Instead of saying "yep, I messed up!" the blame is laid at someone else's door. No wonder our youth have such problems. They do not know how to accept consequences for their actions, they do not know how to learn from their mistakes and they are not prepared for the real world. When will we wake up?

I've talked to my daycare/preschool provider about this recently and I'm amazed that when she has problems with kids, most of the other parents ask what was done to their child to "make" them do whatever they did that was wrong. When we are told about one of the other children doing something to one of ours, the first thing I ask is if my child did something to antagonize the other child. Not that the other child should not be punished, but I know how kids are, especially mine. I know as much as I love my little "angels", they very well did something that contributed to the situation and should probably bear some of the fault (though not all, since we are all responsible for our reactions!)

I'm very concerned about the world my children will be going into when they get older because there are so many out there that do not believe consequences for wrong actions apply to them. We can only blame ourselves for this since our children will never learn how to take care of themselves and be responsible for themselves if we do not teach them.

More Pictures

I've not been writing much lately. Most of my time is spent with the baby and making sure I spend enough time with Tyler & Austin too. I've been getting reading done that I need to do, but my writing has been put on the back burner quite a bit lately. I'll be starting back up again soon though!

We took all the kids to Kiddie Kandids today to have their pictures taken. Here are the pictures they emailed to me. The ones we actually purchased have fancy borders and other stuff with them, but these are just the plain pictures.

Boy, was this an adventure. None of them wanted to cooperate, at least not at the same time. But the two girls taking the pictures were great! Enjoy!!

Aim 4 Asia - Agape International

This is a site I wanted to share with everyone. A friend of mine sold their home and moved to Cambodia about a year ago with her family (three children and her husband) to serve with this group full time. They are in the process of constructing an aftercare facility for children (mostly young girls) who have been pressed into the sex trade business in Cambodia. They are working with the government to make changes in the country.

Also, recently another couple I know made a trip over there to help out with this project for a couple of weeks. They saw it as a very rewarding experience.

Please take a few minutes to check out this website which explains to situation and explains this group's mission.

Aim4Asia

The Books I would write. . .

This week's Sunday Scribblings.

This is my first time to write for Sunday Scribblings. I was going to do so last week, but my little one came two weeks early and I ended up in the hospital when I was planning to write. But now I have a new baby at home who is sleeping right now and I LOVE this week's subject.

The books I would write would be historical novels. Specifically biblical historical novels. Lately I've noticed a lot of these on the shelves at bookstores and I've really enjoyed the ones I've read. You get a good story to read and can compare it back to scripture and do some bible study at the same time.

While doing my bible reading lately I've come across many stories in the bible that are just briefly touched on that I believe would make wonderful novels if expanded on.

Here are some of my ideas:

1. Acts 10 - Story of Peter and Cornelius. Cornelius is a Roman army officer who calls for Peter. Before his servant contacts Peter, Peter has a dream in which God speaks to him and tells him the good news is not only for the Jews but for the Gentiles as well. Once Cornelius' servant arrives, Peter goes back with him to Cornelius' home and the entire family is saved.

2. Jesus' miracles - There are tons of stories in the gospels that could be expanded on. Just take any of Jesus' miracles and write about the person whose life he touched. This would be telling the "behind the scenes" story of this person before they met Jesus and their lives were changed forever. I could either write separate novels on different individuals OR I could write one novel with a bunch of shorter stories that expand on a number of individuals.

• Matthew 8 - Jesus heals a leper. "Lord," the man said, "if you want to , you can make me well again." Jesus touched him, "I want to," he said. "Be healed!" (Matthew 8:2-3)

3. Noah - I think this would be a fun one to do. But instead of telling it from Noah's perspective I'd like to write it from the perspective of various individuals around him. His wife, his sons, his daughther-in-laws or even those who ridiculed him and ended up perishing when the rains came.

There are tons of these that I could do. The more I read, the more ideas I come up with!

Another story I would love to write would be about a woman named Amy ("Beloved") and is a love story. In the story Amy represents humankind and the man in the story represents God. No matter how much Amy runs from this man and no matter what she does with her life, he continues to pursue and woo her. He is willing to forgive her from anything she has done as long as she willing turns to him and loves him. He loves her unconditionally, even though she may feeel worthless at times due to her past experiences (self-inflicted and those she had no control over).

Here is the first paragraph I've written so far on this one. (I've shared it in a previous blog)

In His Eyes

Introducing Jesse

He's two weeks early, but I'm proud to announce the arrival of my third precious child. Jesse was born early Friday morning and already has his big sister and big brother totally fascinated.

8 lbs 5 oz (not bad for 2 wks early)
20 inches

Proud big sister, Tyler holding Jesse at the hospital when she came to visit Mommy and Jesse.

Austin giving his new baby brother a hug! He loves the baby, but we'll have to watch him since he does not realize he's much bigger. He wants to touch and hug the baby all the time!

Comprehension of Scripture

My simple church is doing a study on endtimes right now and one of the items mentioned in the beginning of one book we are reading caught my attention. It is in the first chapter of Endtimes: Simplified by David Sliker and applies to the Bible regardless of what you are studying.

Many say they don't read the Bible or they get frustrated because it is too confusing and they can not comprehend it, especially when it comes to the study of endtimes (eschatology). Many feel that unless you've gone to school and studied the bible in seminary you can not fully understand God's Word.

This is not true. God wants to reveal himself to everyone who truely seeks Him. A statement David makes in this book is that our comprehension of the Bible has nothing to do with our wordly wisdom, worldly degrees or education. Our comprehension of the Bible is directly related to our relationship with the Lord.

"Our greatest problem in comprehending the Word is not the Word itself, or our
lack of intellect, but our lack of true intimacy with Jesus. . . Our lack of
comprehension is directly proportionate to our distance from God and His
heart. Intelligence will never bridge that gap, intimacy with Jesus will."

The more I think on this and compare it to my life, the more I see this as the truth. Those times when I've found myself falling away from my time with God (prayer and reading) I've found it harder to comprehend what God is saying to me through His Word. I've often wondered how some can read through the whole Bible and not see the amazing God that I see when I read it. This could very well explain it.

Whether you agree with this at the moment or not, it is something to really think about. God's ways and thoughts are high above ours and we can not put Him in a box of the world's making. Therefore, it makes perfect sense that His requirements for understanding His Word (intimacy with Him) would not be the same as what the world's requirements for understanding would be (education, intelligence, etc).

If nothing else, think on this for a bit.

"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but
to us who are being saved it is the power of God. For it is written: 'I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate.' Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world?" (1 Corinthians 1:18 - 19)

Passover - Fulfillment

The symbolism of Passover was fulfilled by Jesus when He first came to this earth as our Messiah. Here are some examples:

1. Three matzahs & breaking of the middle matzah
Rabbinic tradition has held that the three matzahs represent the three types of Jewish people: the priests, the Levites, and the Israelites. Another tradition says they represent the three patriarchs: Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Yet neither of these explain the broken matzah.

The three matzah represent the trinity of the Godhead: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The middle matzah which is broken represents the Son, Jesus. He was broken (died), wrapped and hidden away (buried) and brought back at the third cup of wine (resurrection on the third day).

2. Passover Lamb
Passover foreshadowed the Jewish Messiah as the true Passover Lamb, as spoken about by Isaiah (Isaiah 53). He would be innocent and pure. He would shed His blood to provide deliverance for the nations.

Passover - Part 2

It's been awhile since I last wrote about the Feasts of the Lord. We are starting to study the End Times in my simple church on Tuesday nights. This should go along well with the three fall feasts since they relate to Christ's second coming.

There is so much I could write about Passover, but I'm going to let you do more research if you are interested. I can give you some resources that I've found but I want to get on to the other Feasts as well. I could probably continue to write about Passover for quite some time if I let myself.

Today, I'm going to share with you the meaning of the four cups of wine from the Passover meal.

The First Cup - This cup is poured by the father who asks everyone to rise. He then raises the cup to heaven and recites the prayer of sanctification (Kiddush). This sets the day apart to God.

Blessed art Thou, O Lord our God, King of the universe, Who createst the fruit
of the vine. Blessed art Thou, O Lord our God, Who hast chosen us for Thy
service from among the nations . . . Blessed are Thou, O Lord our God, King of
the universe, Who hast kept us in life, Who hast preserved us, and hast enabled
us to reach this season.

Jesus said the Kiddush as the leader of the Seder service in the Upper Room.
"Then He took the cup, and gave thanks." Luke 22:17

The Second Cup - The second cup is poured and in response to four questions a lengthy narrative of the Passover story is shared beginning with Abraham in Ur. As the ten plagues are described a tiny bit of wine is poured out for each plague to represent the sorrow felt for the Egyptian's suffering. Once the first half of the praise psalms (Hallel) is recited the second cup is taken.

The Third Cup - This is called the Cup of Redemption. It is at this point that Jesus instituted the Lord's Supper as we know it as a reminder of His redemptive work on the cross. Since Passover is closely associated with the hope of the coming of the Messiah, a child is sent to the front door after the third cup to welcome in the prophet Elijah. It is believed based on scripture that he would appear, drink the cup and announce the Messiah.

"I will send you Elijah the prophet Before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord." (Mal. 4:5)

The Fourth Cup - Known as the Cup of Acceptance or Praise. This is the cup that Jesus said He would not drink until He drank it with His disciples in the Kingdom. Jesus realized His time of acceptance by the Jews was still yet in the future.

As I said above there is so much more to this celebration and meal which I encourage everyone to look into further. At this time though I'll be moving on the the next Feast of the Lord, the Feast of Unleavened Bread after I post regarding the fulfillment of Passover by Jesus, the Messiah.

Here is a site I've found with alot of information about the Passover celebration

Judaism 101 - Pesach: Passover